Got crabs?
This past Mother's Day, I spent four hours with a prospective client who was ready to change to her fitness routine. I don't like appointments on Sundays, but she was a new first-time mom and needed the flexibility.
No biggie. Her name is Laila and here's the true story ...
We spent the morning diving into her unique situation, from her health history and lifestyle habits to her goals and schedule. This mom had been working out with a personal trainer twice per week for the last year without seeing any kind of progress.
This happens more often than not, for more reasons than I have room to write.
A slam dunk case of not being consistent enough with physical activity, but most importantly, she was eating out for lunch and dinner every weekday! I can't even fathom the breakdown of convenience food spending on her card.
Laila had a lot to get off her chest, and I let her vent for a couple hours. I could tell she was just at a place of immense frustration and didn't understand why she wasn't seeing progress after what she perceived to be a lot of work.
I lay it all out for her with a customized action plan for success. Laila was so genuinely excited! The typical gym environment was intimidating to her, which is why she never joined anywhere before.
Luckily for her, she loved the unique vibe of Forward Thinking Fitness.
We spent another hour together getting her all set up to start on Monday, with the exception of her baseline testing. Laila had to get to a Mother's Day lunch with her extended family, so we planned to meet after to wrap up.
When she came back to finish up her assessments, her eagerness was all gone. Laila shared with me the feedback she received during lunch ...
Come on, you know yourself. You're never going to keep up with it.
It's crazy to spend that much money on your health.
Just accept who you are and stop trying new things.
I love you, but this gym is for young people and you aren't that.
That's what Laila's family said when she shared her excitement about finally making a positive change in her life. I was very direct in educating her to explain that her family is actually a bucket of crabs.
If you don't know what I'm talking about, I'll explain. When crabs are caught and placed in a bucket, the lucky ones at the top have a chance to escape. Sadly, the crabs that don't have the same chance will work together to bring the potential escapee back down into their bucket of misery.
People who are unaccomplished and unfulfilled in life will behave like crabs toward others who work hard and want to reach all their goals. They project their failures onto others who haven't given up yet in a passive-aggressive attempt to make them quit.
Misery loves company, after all.
I challenge you to think critically about who you spend your time with if you want to get ahead in life. I bet you can't think of one successful person around you that acts like a crab. That's because those folks are always the ones who choose to settle in life and spend all the extra time wallowing in their shortcomings.
Sadly for Laila, she talked herself out of success after the seeds of doubt were panted in her head by those unhappy with their own lives. In the meantime, the insanity goes on - trying the same things while expecting different results.
Do yourself a favor and throw the crabs around you back in the ocean where they belong. Life is way too short to be held down while working to become the best version of yourself!
